Friday, October 10, 2008

Who am I to presume...

Sometimes I try to presume what is best for me in certain situations. I give God a timeline and when, in fact, He doesn't react as I suspect He should I decide what my road map should be. So often I want to be in control, but every time I find out that I, in fact, am not. 

I'm sure this isn't the most profound thing anyone has ever heard. I would imagine we all see this momentarily, daily, weekly, yearly. God gives us all those "Aha!" moments when we see what He was doing all along. I say all this because there are often times when I feel exceptionally blessed. I tell my close friends how "spoiled" I am, not to sound cocky, but to simply point out how immeasureable my God's love is for me. The most recent situation that causes me to be blown away is my current job. Three years ago I was in college regretting that I hadn't forked out the extra dough to play a college sport. You see, when I was going off to college I simply couldn't fathom turning down a full academic scholarship to pay $23,000 at another school just so I could play field hockey. So, as I began to regret this decision during my junior year of college I made a simple change to my facebook account... (as we all know, whatever is on facebook is absolute truth!) For about six months all my about me said was, " I want to go back in time and be a college athlete". You see, I thought I had missed it. I was getting into watching sports and longing for the days of being apart of a team and playing. 

Blessing Number One: When I came home from college I got offered a job as the head varsity lacrosse coach at Kirkwood. I coached there for three years and LOVED it. I promise you it is what kept me going during those early days back in the STL after college. 

Blessing Number Two: Just as God ran out of His time limit to give me a new focus for my life I decided to move to Colorado. I won't say this was the worst decision of my life, just the decision I thought best for the time. Right before I moved God shows up yet again with a different plan. I was offered head coach at Missouri Baptist University. Although every adventurous bone in my body wanted to flee to Rocky Mountain High I accepted the gift I was being offered and cancelled my lease in Fort Collins. 

Blessing Number Three: Last night was my first game as a collegiate coach. I was VERY apprehensive about it. The last coach didn't recruit much, so I was left with a team of 10 players. I recruited an old Young Life girl to be my goalie which brought the grand total to 11...little problem: it takes 12 girls to field a team. SO I played with them. I was NOT super excited about it because I just wanted to coach. However, after a goal I was running back to the center circle and had an epiphany. I just sort of stopped and thought, "God, you are funny!"... Flashback to my facebook about me in 2005. "I want to go back in time and be a college athlete". Go back in time? Ha... God is thinking, "That won't be necessary". 

It hasn't all been roses, but I will say I am amazed on a daily basis by how spoiled I am in how God blesses me. Who am I to presume I know what the plan should be? 

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